Lovely Sites

I know I haven't been on here much lately (ahem, in the past year or so) but I've been checking out these lovely sites recently:


Pinterest
the place to collect pretty pictures

Instagr.am
lets me pretend like i have photographic abilities by placing filters right onto my iphone pictures with a handy app!

I got your back

Step season Thanksgiving 
Thankful for esp in these stressful times:

1) Friends& family who keep me sane/ make laugh
-Giulia growing Roma tomatoes and putting on an episode of family guy 
-Wilson who makes me laugh with a look & gives me back rubs
-My mom and dad who are constantly supportive of my incessant need to study. And hare their  love  with me thru morning text messages, phone calls & food 

2)Eating out
-having a girls breakfast with Jessica and Giulia in downtown Bryan

3) nail polish
New Essie brand! Oh the colors!
Great quality.

4) Eddie & Claudia being happy to see me when I come home

5) cucumber plant
-our battle: it to live, me to ignore it for being too needy. Day after a torrential downpour and it's limping?? Drama queen.

what makes sense?

pretty much only my need to study for medical school and constantly improve myself as a future physician. and the love and support of my family. and gewels and claudia and eddie. That's pretty much all that makes sense to me in my life.

I have reached a new point in my life/mindset. Yes, I am all about medical school and being the best possible medical student. And that will come first, especially next semester when I study for Step 1. But i'm ready for whatever else comes in my life. I am done playing just for fun. I am done with aquatic snails. I am mostly ...okay yes, I am done with broccoli. I want to be open to the possibility of meeting someone seriously. If life throws that at me, great, I'm here. If that doesn't happen anytime soon, great, I'll keep chugging along.

It's just hard to be patient sometimes. I feel like I am so ready, that I have so much love to give and such a desire to be loved. But I have to trust in the Lord. I have faith that everything happens for a reason. I have faith in where I am going in my life.

Since I met Wisconsin, I've known a handful of things about him that I am sure about. 1) he is a great guy 2) he is fun to hang around with 3) (crazy i know) if i somehow ended up married with him, I would be happy, content.
4) (and probably the most important) he is my reminder to have hope. That there are great guys out there and I shouldn't give up if i have to kiss a few frogs along the way.

I've been tossing these thoughts around in my head for a while now but I just got off the phone with Wisconsin. And he told me how his 26 year old friend made the conscious choice to look for "the one" about a year and a half ago and found her this past weekend. ...and all I can think is "reeeally?! seriously? he was ready, so he found her...(as this 22 year old hunk is telling me how ready he is to become a seal and run off with the navy)...whhhhhy do you do this to me life? why?"

Best advice of the week: if it's right, it's easy.

And beyond all these thoughts, it's impossible for me to know what's around the corner. I can hardly say what tomorrow will be like, let alone next semester, next year, etc. One day at a time. But with enthusiasm :)

oh & p.s. I got my hair cut <3

Listening to :
The Good Times Are Killing Me - Modest Mouse

Perfect Games by the Broken West

And just for fun: a 3-D dinosaur pancake!


"I was born with an enormous need for affection, and a terrible need to give it."
~Audrey Hepburn

Pure Happiness

I just got my first pair of real boots!!
It's ridiculous how happy these make me. Here's a picture of two things that make me ridiculously happy right now.

I may go home tomorrow or not. I will probably wear these boots tomorrow since its going to be 39 degrees for the low (and 70 for the high) meh

At this moment (11:42pm)I am happy.
I'm gonna try to be by myself for a little while. Because I honestly have not done that. I am going to rejoice in my friends and all of my blessings. and be continually thankful for my Italian sister. It's time to be a little fair to myself. Did I mention how much I love my new boots & eddie?

Friday fun

I love the use of the artichoke and cacti in these flowers!! creative idea!

Van Gogh Tilt-Shifted -makes paintings look 3D!

And a funny quote for the day:
"To love is to suffer. To avoid suffering one must not love. But then one suffers from not loving. Therefore to love is to suffer, not to love is to suffer.To suffer is to suffer. To be happy is to love. To be happy then is to suffer. But suffering makes one unhappy. Therefore, to be unhappy one must love,or love to suffer, or suffer from too much happiness. I hope you're getting this down." Woody Allen

Lovestruck

I have the best Giulia ever. She went away to Dallas for the weekend and comes back with the things I love just for me...a dishtowel, with cupcakes on it. and oh. my. gosh. Sprinkles cupcakes... love much?!?!




oh and a note on men:
I am in such trouble. it's unbelievable.

The Universe

I think the universe is taking care of me.
I need to remember to just let go, and have faith that things will work out as they should

I've been feeling like this mainly because I am so happy with being busy studying heme/onc (and doing well so far) but also happy from talking with WI! I get to study all I want but I still get to talk to a guy who makes me happy. I'm happy to have a great guy who i get to see soon but sometimes it's difficult to be apart. but it allows me/us to focus on achieving our own personal goals. It allows me to completely focus on medical school (and he's reeeeally good about knowing that school comes first), so I get to be the best med student I can be. But I find myself looking forward to talking with him or getting a text from him that just makes me smile...so my world is supporting me right now.

I'm really loving heme/onc block. It's super interesting to me and has me thinking that doing a peds heme/onc rotation would be fun during 4th year. I just don't know if I could survive/love the clinical side of this specialty... But I'm loving heme/onc soo much that when our professor asked us to research the reasoning behind a phlebotomy treatment for the treatment of Porphyria Cutanae Tarda, it peeked my interest. I found out that releasing blood in turn lowers the iron levels which helps because the enzyme, urophoryprinogen decarboxylase (UROD) is inhibited by iron. So by decreasing blood levels, the enzyme can return to functioning at a normal level and the porphyria pathway can continue, thus allowing heme production and RBC production to continue. This clears up the cutaneous symptoms of PCT! ta-dah!
Yup, I so impressed the professor with the research behind my answer ( I literally found an old article & copy/pasted the source that listed additional source with articles that tested phlebotomy vs iron-chelating therapies)....that he gave me $20!! He said that I was the nerdest medical student (but a kindred soul in heme?) hahaha! I was congratulated the rest of the day by my fellow med students for winning the prize out of the 11 of the 150-something students in our class!

Also, I performed my first female genital exam & fake pap smear yesterday! It wasn't so bad and actually interesting to see/feel a cervix for the first time. It was really intersting that I immediately started talking to the SP completely comfortably...like I was in an actual clinic and had no problem talking with the patient (yay! thank you summer clinic work!). The standardized patient even said I did "great"!


i want one these for my trip to Wisconsin.

i was thinking, it would be great to be able to share my life, share my day with someone. But then I realized I do! I do with Giulia at our house & my classmates at school. I get to talk with my family & WI. And if I need a little extra cuddling, claudia & eddie do just fine.

That's probably an example of how I have just been thinking differently lately. I'm not preoccupied with dating or guys anymore. I'm completely happy with talking to WI and studying. I love it!!!!! It's the first time that I've ever felt my mind calm down. Maybe that's because I know I have a 10 in my personal life & i'm doing excellent in my academic life? :)

Oh and apparently there was a real physical reason I was craving chocolate. haha!

I love chocolate.

So I've been eating a lot of chocolate these days....today.
I'm eating chocolate because it's easy to sneak into the lecture hall (where you're not suppose to eat anything) and perfect for those times when I get so bored of learning about important things like antineoplastics and reticulocytes & my mind starts to wander...chocolate is my substitute for other distracting cravings. like making out with that cute guy in the hat over there. yeah, those kinds of cravings.

I'm trying to behave myself lately for two reasons.
One, I'm technically single but I met this really great guy in Ecuador (he's from WI) and I'm still talking to him. He's basically the most genuinely good guy I know. Oh and he's really funny & really attractive. He's pretty much everything that I 've been looking for in a guy: confident, funny, intelligent, good-looking, hard-working, loves dogs, likes actually getting to know each other -just talking, dependable, sweet yet wild, attentive & likes to cuddle! I mean come on. The only thing is he happens to live over 1,000 miles away. It's so not fair. And I'll be flying out to WI to see him in Septemember...so even though we aren't officially dating, we have been texting & talking to each other every day. So I feel like if you have someone that awesome, you should just appreciate that.
Two, since I am single, I've been trying to decide what this means for myself. Should I be dating and hanging out with guys just to have contact & that kinda interaction even if it doesn't lead to a relationship (or that I don't want a relationship with someone) until I meet someone (like WI) who I truly want a relationship with? Or should I be keeping to myself, not taking part in any kind of physical contact until I'm in a solid relationship again? Also, what as a Catholic should I do?

....ahhhhh! and then part of me just says stop worrying! worrying does no good. So for now, I'm just eating lots of chocolate. And going on lots of runs because of aforementioned chocolate.

Check out these other things that also entertained me when I should have otherwise been paying attention to lecture:

Scratch off map
summer lasagne

Spaghetti Lobster Monsters

....that's why I love giulia. i write spaghetti lobsters and she adds monsters!

Because I treat this blog as my journal, I feel the need to make a note of this time in my mentality so that my future self can remember when my thinking took a notable change.
If that makes any sense at all, sorry self.

On our Texas road trip, Giulia & I stopped by to see a certain pair of M3s in Austin. One of them is super nice (& just happens to be really cute) but really he's genuinely nice (& one of my roommates may have had a lil' crush on him). The other M3 was, well broccoli, as surprises just about nobody at this point I'm sure.
So we knocked on their door & broccoli answers it, without a shirt on...which is typical (but left Giulia asking herself "who do you think you are?!" hahah!)
But nothing happened & I thanked goodness for that. The funny thing was, he was just very nice the whole time. And I was physically ill the whole time. haha I told my roomies, I think this is a sign, you shouldn't hang around someone who makes you literally sick to your stomach! Giulia called it anxiety.

After having a picnic at the capital and hunting down the elusive McKinney Park waterfall(s), we made it to San Antone. And after hanging out for a bit, giules left back up I-35 and I hung out at home. Until Saturday. Because I couldn't leave good enough alone. I visited BookPeople (an amazing bookstore) and ended up partying on 6th street again. And I ran into broccoli. And we had a good time but I walked away knowing that I had him completely out of my system now. We were still attracted to each other but I didn't feel like he was impossibly, devilishly attractive (like I used to)...it was so much better when we actually cared for each other. This time, it felt like we were both kinda over each other. He's just not always so nice in his attitude towards me...which makes me feel like I have to be simultaneously perfect & on the defense the whole time, which is super lame. I want to be with someone who enjoys being with me, just to be with me! And I want someone who is a genuine good guy! And I happily know this is possible now after meeting Wisconsin :)

so for the next five weeks, i'll be counting down & working my lil' rear-end off through hematology/oncology block until I get to jump on a plane to the badger state! After watching Sleepless in Seattle today, I have to admit I've entertained an idea or two about Wisconsin but I'm trying to keep my feet on the ground...at least one foot.

But I have no desire to get back to CS and mingle with the M1s. Instead I'm looking forward to hanging out with this cutie...here's another reason why i love my roomie...she adopted Eddie, the cutest grass-hopping dachshund in Texas! He's the new love in my life, right now.

August 6th

home sweet home

today was a wonderful day at home!
This morning started with potatoe & egg breakfast tacos & coffee from Taco Cabana with my mom. Then picked up my grandma, Ba and went shopping for my lil' sister's surprise replacement watch & I ended up getting a Fossil watch that I thought would be my Christmas present. Then I met Giulia at a spa and chatted with her at her appointment until she finished. Then we went to my house where we painted our nails & sun-bathed by the pool! Then I went shopping with my mom for a bathroom rug for my very own bathroom! Afterwards, we got ice cream & watched Eclipse! (so good! and Jacob is much cuter!) And then, we met my dad for a delicious steak dinner at the roadhouse with a very cute waiter. And now I'm laying bed because I didn't get much sleep last night! woo! a day full of running around but also a day of relax & recharging, spent with some of my favorite ladies! It was great just hanging out with my mom and Ba.

I'm the proud new owner of this cute watch


Dinner with the rents


And a beautiful, wide-open Texas sky to finish it off!

What a great day in San Antone!

A Cross-Texas Adventure

Today I was home sweet home for the first time in a week!

Giulia & I ended our cross Texas adventure with our last stop in San Antonio. We got in last night and each had dinner with our families. Then we caught a midnight showing of "The Other Guys". And we even managed to squeeze in a bit of nail painting & sun bathing time before she left for Dallas today.
It was a great trip & I'm so glad we did it. It was all about freedom and being able to do whatever we wanted to do, without any time limits or responsibilities to answer to! Here are a few pictures from our week-long trek across Tejas:

Sprinkles, the amazingly good cupcake store!


Giulia, me & the lovely Miss Natalie




The new love in my life, Eddie


Friends in College Station!


IKEA!

Tourist

I'm in Dallas, living it up as a tourist. I've loved hanging out with Giulia & seeing dallas but all today, I've been a little preoccupied....I just did something crazy. I bought airplane tickets to go to WI and see a boy i met in Ecuador. I kinda call him a boy here because he's a year younger than me & goes out to the bars with his friends a lot but he's a senior in undergrad still. But in reality, I liked him because of his good character, how intelligent he is (& maybe that great smile and those blue eyes and muscles).... 
I just bought those tickets but I scared. I don't know what to expect when I go up there but what I'm really thinking about is how much I want to have a significant other. 
I'm scared because I don't know what things are between me & Jimmy, and I really want someone good like him (or him but he lives in Wisconsin...). I'm scared because for some reason I want to stop by & see someone in RR when we go thru Austin. Even though I know he's no good for me & it would never work out & he doesn't deserve my company with the way he sometimes treated me before...when we broke up, he said that we could date again when he moved to RR & I guess on some level part of me is waiting to see what happens to that. Even though, if he couldn't make time for me before when we lived in the same city, why would he travel 2 hrs to see me now? and really, I don't want him back. I want someone better than that. But what I do want is to feel loved again, like I did when I was with him... But I do trust WI more than I ever did trust RR. I just wonder if things could work out between TX & WI? Or what "work out" would even mean to me. All I know is I'm excited to go to WI and just enjoy hanging out. No matter what happens, it'll be an adventure! Oh the places you'll go! Oh the things you do for love.

hola from la playa

Howdy world!
Its been well over a month since the last time I talked to you! So sorry but i've been terribly busying loving my life in Ecuador & at Padre Island!! I've been a very lucky, busy girl :)




Friday night notes
1. I loove love smelling like the Island Waters lotion from Victoria's Secret!
2. Ecuador was so fun!
3. Today I was missing someone I met in Ecuador, especially when I realized it's only been 4 or 5 days since I last saw him! Eeep! especially when I wont see him again till Sept or Nov!
4. I can't put down Nicholas Spark's "The Lucky One", partly because it reminds me so much of him
5. I am so sure these days. I have faith. I have faith to walk waaay out into the murky ocean off the Texas coast because I know nothing will get me. This is a new feeling.
6. I have faith that I will see him again.
7. I have faith in fate. that i will end up wherever i'm suppose to, with whoever i should.
8. I'm going to fly to Dallas next friday to see my lovely Giulia! super excited!
9. Definitely going to Sprinkles, for the first time ever .
10. School is nearly 3 weeks away!
11. The ex is particularly good-looking again since he no longer resemebles brocoli. but #1 thank goodness he lives in a different city now #2 thank goodness i've realized how not nice he is, mainly because i've met someone so good. a real good guy.
12. Leaving the beach tomorrow & going home to San Antone for till Friday.
13. I'm a few shades more golden
14. I can't wait to be creative & bake nutella cupcakes & scrapbook again!
15. life is very interesting & exciting.

Tomorrow morning I jump on a plane to Ecuador! I am half scared, half very excited.

I will miss my family & friends. I will miss watching the World Cup!! You'll have to let me know who wins. And I am lamenting the leaving behind all of my cute clothes because I'll mainly be wearing scrubs 24/7.

Hi world

This is me with shorter hair & bangs. And by the way, I love weekends!
This was my first weekend of summer vac-a where I didn't HAVE to do anything. It was ohhh so lovely :) I had a party at my house with some old friends, slept in, ate pancakes & waffles & waay too much food. And my mom spoiled me with taking me shopping for supplies for Ecuador, just bare necessities but it was much appreciated! OH and so exicting, I got a pair of scrubs that actually fit me!!! Because I am so petite this is an amazing feat! And I look so cute in scrubs hahaha.
I started "100 years of Solitude", brushed up on some Spanish, started reading some journal articles about Chagas Disease & had some Orange Cup/ wandered around Apple & Anthropologie with Greg. Fun times! I now have a long grocery list of kitchen things I fell in love with at Anthro. Oh and I finally pasted down my scrapbook page of PR with Giules!
And most importantly world, I just wanted to let you know that I am happy. I'm happy with life right now. Just being home is nice. Working in the peds clinic is interesting & eye-opening. And Ecuador promises to be different. And when I come back mid-July we are taking a family vaca to the beach. And then I'll have three weeks off before M2 year starts up. Thank goodness. It's definitely an interesting time in my life. Oh and p.s. my mom and I have plans to make beneigts! One of these days...

Last day as an M1

These are the beautiful flowers I saved from an early end when I was quite literally the only person studying at school this last weekend...but it paid off when it came to my exam & I kinda had a lovely time too. I took a break with dinner to photograph the place I've lived at for the past 10 or so months. I also got the chance to take some more jumping pictures :) yay!








Dear Life,
I hope that you never cease to surprise & amaze me. Thank you for the past year, my first year in medical school. This morning I realized that my life is completely different than I thought it would be but it's also awe-some. Thank you for Giulia & Jessica and all of my friends and family. And thank you for the chance to become a doctor. I'm officially an M2! And summer has officially begun, the last & most appreciated summer of my life.
Love you,
Lydia, M2.

Going study crazy in lh2...

Do note I was studying antipsychotics...possibly for self-medication. jk!...So I still have two weeks of med school class left. last class was today but I still have 2 major tests...and i'm soo bored/tired of studying...so close to summer! I'm living for an ice cream break with Giulia at 9:30...

You know you're a nerdy medical student when you read NEJM for fun...

Save the Turtles!

Maybe I need to buy some peonies...

Peanut Butter, Cinnamon & Chocolate Chip cookies! ...they are/were delish!

A cat, a burrito, and a bowling ball...

...just kidding, no bowling ball but some awesome new pots instead!
Today, my happiness costs about $50...hahaha but I am super duper happy!!!

For the next 3 weeks, we have an orange tabby at our house. His name is captain kittypants, but I just call him the captain. He is currently residing underneath Jessica's bed until he figures out what to do with the dogs.



I'm going to grow tomatoes!! And a succulent (eg like a cactus)!
I bought these beautiful new pots, a "husky cherry tomatoe" plant and a __ moonglow succlent. My goal is not to kill them.




And tonight I had Chipotle for the first time in foooorever! I kinda love chipotle but forgot this. So now I'm gorging on a chicken burrito (without sour cream but with corn = win), a bag of chips, and my new love, a sparkiling blackberry IZZE soda. Seriously. I'm in love.

== this all makes for one suuuper happy Lydia.

Tuesday-aroni

sometimes what you have is better than what you planned.
sometimes it's better than you could even dream.
sometimes you are soo incredibly blessed with amazing friends.
sometimes you only get 4 hours of sleep.
and sometimes everyone else around you is sleeping the ADHD pharmacology lecture...

only 3 weeks of school left!!
Giulia has decided to call "studying" by a happier name:
"back to swimming in jello with rainbow iguanas and boxer pants"

As soon as I get back to San Antone, I'm going to buy some of these for our house next year. They will be so cute with our blue glasses from World Market!



And I can't wait to scrapbook this summer! To scrapbook everything over the past 10 months & see how fast time reeeeeally does move. at the speed of medical school


And this sooo makes me want a dog. again. maybe next semester. or third year. or in a few years lol.

<3

Oh the Possibilities...

Last night, something happened.
Something that made all the other guys in my life fade away a bit more.
I'm not going to say too much more

other than we had a couple of really great conversations. and we kissed.
but this morning is back to it. back to the ol' books and hiding away behind bookstacks that read "Wools and Wattles"

Claudia is now trying to step all over my computer so I guess I'll get off...good move dog.

Listening to Fiest's "I Feel It All" & "My Moon my Man"<3